Waitress in a haggis restaurant in Edinburgh. Luggage porter in London. Fish scaler in a Japanese restaurant in Halifax. Champagne girl for rich, gross men. Cashier at McDonalds. Content producer at MBIE. Anais, my Catalan date, and I leave Why Me? talking about the horrendous jobs we’ve had in the past (and present, sadly) – and you know what? It does feel good to realise we’re not alone in the terrible choices we’ve made, or the well-below-our-skills jobs we’ve had to take to make ends meet.  

Is Why Me? an uplifting experience as producer/director/actor Georgia Kellett intended? That depends. I find myself eyeing the exit about 10 minutes in, but my partner in crime convinces me that in fact this trio of nouvelle-vague theatre whippersnappers have designed it this way. Let me explain.

The music is terrible because it’s meant to be monotonous, repetitive and annoying just like the elevator music it imitates. The light box is a character in and of itself, acting alongside Kellett and her actor buddies, Jeremy Hunt and Bella Petrie. While Kellett is clearly a project manager or account director and Hunt is a waiter, it’s less clear as to what role Petrie is playing. Barcelona thinks cheerleader, I say camp leader. We fear we’re both wrong.

What we do know for sure is that everyone on stage is overworked, exhausted, and on the verge of a nervous breakdown. At first, they’re into their high energy jobs, like we all are when we throw ourselves into work thinking we’ll find meaning and fulfilment in it.

As the play goes on, our characters become less disillusioned than woke to the fact they’re being treated badly, the work they do is not at all the work they want to be doing and they are ultimately dying a slow death for the benefit of their overlord bosses. Sound familiar? Pass that Chardonnay and let’s drown our sorrows together.

To be honest, there are laughs coming from the crowd but we can’t really understand why. I assume it’s due to the physical theatre aspect but the movements aren’t exaggerated enough to bring my own guffaw or snort. At one point, I start counting the people in the audience to figure out the math of how many hours of life we’re owed back. And I’m serious: this play is about doing something deliberate with our time, because our time is all we have and damn it, it’s precious. Do you really want to be watching Love is Blind, or would you rather be working on that novel you started 4 years ago?

Again, my partner quips that feeling of wanting to be anywhere else is intended: we’re being pushed to feel uncomfortable because we should all feel uncomfortable with the amount of time we spend doing things we’d rather not be (Love is Blind is not included in this list; don’t judge me).

The best part of the play is seeing these flexible, agile, physically strong performers use their energy to work with the box and each other. They’re pushing the thing, lifting it, holding it up, throwing their lithe bodies over it like they’ve got super powers. Of course they have youth on their side. I’d like more dialogue but hey, this is physical theatre so I’ll just shut up about the lack of real words. I guess the point is that we don’t need words to convey the truth that none of us are alone with the shit we do day in and day out. Angry bosses? Tick. Unfair work conditions? Yes. Complete and utter exhaustion? You know it.

But don’t worry, Why Me? is not all moving around at a rapid pace and energetic buzz: our characters reach breaking point and make drastic decisions. Thank goodness, they’re human.

It’s rather fun being taken back to my own days of working in crummy jobs, having enough, throwing down my apron mid-tanty, grabbing my ice cream machine and walking out waving a middle finger in the air. Those were the days. Why Me?’s characters end up doing what they need to do to find their own happiness, and I’m jelly. Is this a reality for most of us? Probably not – we’ve got to harden up, suck it up and do the work.

This is theatre and this is just a play so I don’t know why I’m expecting it to stick to the grim reality that in fact, for most of us, we have to work shitty jobs to put food on the table. I should be happy about this glimmer of hope that Kellett et al leave us with, which is that ultimately we are in control of what we do with our lives. I know this isn’t true which is exactly why it stings the most. I leave wanting to quit my job immediately. How I’d love to throw my lanyard down and start beatboxing for cash. Wouldn’t you love to say, “No, Frank, I can’t do that and I’ll be taking a week off work,” and then go to a park and sit in the sun? Damn right you would.

I guess the best takeaway from Why Me? is that when you’re hating your life, you can bet that the people around you are hating their own just as much. It’s not an uplifting truth, but it’s a truth that just might inspire you to say “Enough!”, throw that lanyard or apron down, rip up some post-its, toss your clipboard into the air, walk out the door and find your bliss. I dare you to. 

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