Failing to win Miss Waikuku Beach contest in 1983 may have been traumatic for Penny Ashton but it gave her a strong reason to investigate the world of beauty pageants and write this whole new season of great comedy. Having written poems and songs about the mating game, body image and even a musical based on Jane Austen, Ashton creates a documentary on the Miss Universe pageant in Los Angeles in 2010 and uses part of the footage in her show. 

The laughs come frequently, some of them from shock, both at the self revelations about Ms Ashton’s innocent girlhood as well as some of the more alarming insights into the world of the pageant. Dolled up to the nines in ball dress and bow and doubtless sweating under a flowing platinum wig, she makes full use of power point technology to show some appalling images of ugly and fat pageants, as well as click into video and film footage, newspaper articles and old family photographs. Her use of a starry wand as pointer and highlighter is particularly choice.

After recounting that traumatic moment of failure, using family photographs and quotations from her diaries through the 1980’s and 90’s, she sings rousing praise to Lorraine Downes’ glorious Miss Universe achievement in the same year, to the tune of Dexy’s Midnight Runners’ ‘Come on Eileen’. It’s a perfect taste of Ashton’s ability with pastiche, to use nostalgia, parody, history and sex all in one song – and it certainly warms up the crowd.

The documentary itself – though rough around the edges, in light, sound and editing, well most parts – nonetheless has a hand-held spunk about it that makes for interesting viewing. Ashton has a natural warmth that encourages the girls, judges, supporters, fans and other journalists to open up to her and there are some fascinating insights as well as explanations of the sheer length of the competition and the hard process involved. 

Ashton puts herself fully into the story, returning to Miss Philippines just so she could tape the rare compliment from a beauty queen, “Yes, you do have very beautiful eyes.”

The snippets of her documentary are interspersed with images of weird pageants the world over, like a Miss Klingon competition, an ugly dog contest and others even more unusual still.  She gives facts about the history of beauty pageants and a quick survey of some of the scandals where crowns have been wrested from queenly tresses.

She performs two other songs and a side-splitting piece of audience participation where grown-ups don false bikini sets and answer silly questions, all for a sash and joke shop tiara before demonstrating hilarious dance moves in a jazzercise finale.

Ashton is such a well-rounded, no pun intended, performer to watch; she sings well, dances, wears wigs, remembers lines but can improvise. She definitely has beautiful eyes which know how to use the lights and work the crowd. 

It’s a night of total entertainment and great fun, but I would have liked to hear a bit more about teeth.

Copyright © in the review belongs to the reviewer